$8 Love Affair : Why My Sapphic Ride-or-Die Costs Less Than Lunch

by Mel Oliver

A feminist, lesbian, anti-consumer ad for a dyke’s most reliable situationship.

Some lovers are fleeting.
Some lovers require a U-Haul.
Some lovers are non-monogamous paramours who find joy with complex calendars.

And some… are vibrators.

I’ve chased the luxury ones—the ninety-five-dollar waterproof swans with twelve settings and an LED light show. They’re pretty. They purr like your favorite kitty. But too often, they faint halfway through the party, leaving me staring at their satin pouch like an item plucked out from a “Free” Box on the side of the road.

$8 vibe,
She’s loyal.
She’s humble.
She hums like the quietest revolution.

I’ve seen her kind on the bottom shelf of the pharmacy aisle, blushing under fluorescent lights. No sleek packaging. No luxury promises.
Just a small, knowing smirk in blister plastic.

These eight-dollar jawns are a ten if you ask me—a queer fantasy: affordable, reliable, practical, and finishes the job—.

Reclaiming vs Transaction

Transaction in a consumer society such as The United States—will make business impersonal. I say it's always personal and that it’s all our business to get the most pleasure out of it as possible!

History has a funny way of humming. In the 1960s, the Hitachi Magic Wand showed up on the market as an innocent “back massager.” But in the hands of legends like Betty Dodson and Joani Blank, it buzzed its way out of medical gray zones and into feminist workshops, lesbian bedrooms, and storefronts like Good Vibrations and Eve’s Garden. Suddenly, this wasn’t just a machine—it was a revolution in plastic casing: a tool of sovereignty, pleasure, and a little economic rebellion.

I’ve learned to hold space for anti-capitalism in hyperconsumerism:

1. Take pleasure in spending money on yourself.
2. Spend your money on working-class, queer, and small businesses when you can.
3. And sometimes? Find the cheapest, most durable option—more bang for your buck.

Because as technology advances, batteries and chips get smaller, pricier, and more extractive, the humble vibe reminds me there’s another path. Every orgasm is also a reminder: this body is mine. My wallet, my choices, my joy.

That spirit still vibrates today. Queer sex educators keep showing us that pleasure—whether sparked by breath, hands, or your favorite eight-dollar jawn—isn’t frivolous. It’s a guidepost, a kind of queer spirituality. A reminder that even the simplest hum can carry us back to ourselves.

Current queer-owned sex shops you might not mind spreading the love for:

Oakland-based and Black-owned FeelMore
Chicago's North Side’s, Early to Bed
Black and Queer small business, New York Toy Collective
Queer, Trans and Disabled-owned, Cute Little Fuckers

What once hid behind clinical marketing is now out in the open: a joy machine, buzzing with revolution…

Self Reclamation Workshop

Reclamation does not end with the body but also your bank account.

Praise be, $8 vibe!

She doesn’t care if I’m fresh from the gym or traveling across oceans. When I take her in my hand—steady, certain—patient and unblinking—a working-class hero in pastel casing… She doesn’t need charging, she doesn’t overpromise, she doesn’t try to sell me a lifestyle. She just shows up, does her thing, and lets me bask in warmth and good vibrations..

Maybe, rooted in that same radical lineage, my lesbian wisdom summons the underdog. I choose what works and honors my body.

In these economic times, our pleasure doesn't need to cost a fortune. The simple, unpretentious things—the eight-dollar jawns—can bring the fiercest joy. I imagine dykes everywhere, grinning in solidarity, fingers curled, celebrating that sometimes the cheapest item on the shelf is the richest gift you’ll ever give yourself.

References

Best Vibrator (Vibrator Review)
Oh Joy Sex Toy – Hitachi
The Conversation – Vibrators and Medical Quackery
Them – Magic Wand Fun Facts
Buzzfeed - 19 Queer-Owned Sex Toy Shops To Support

Mel Oliver, is a Black Chahta-Indian Lesbian, Environmental Educator, Storyteller, and Healer who spends her time consuming sapphic media, serving community, gardening and hiking with her Carolina Dingo, Louie. She is also Sinister Wisdom's assistant event producer for 2025-2026!

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The Blog Button: Introducing the New Sinister Wisdom Blog

Dear Sinister Wisdom Family,

Hello! My name is Sydney; I’m a writer/musicologist/classical musician, and I had the pleasure of interning for Sinister Wisdom this past summer.

Throughout the internship, I gained experience in reviewing, copy-editing, and research, amongst other things. This was an incredibly beneficial experience (if you’re considering interning, do it, it’s fun) that gave me some Serious Editorial Skills. But anytime I went onto the Sinister Wisdom website, something caught my eye, nagged at me, kept me up at night.

The Blog Button.

I love a blog. It is my guilty pleasure—actually, that’s not true, I’m very proud of my blog addiction. The personal element gives me a fix of parasocial relationships and I love reading different styles of writing. When I clicked on The Blog Button, I was met with the various book lists, which are fantastic (go check them out), but not your typical blog post. I yearned for a space in Sinister Wisdom for slice of life, fun, casual posts. Naturally I reached out to our editor, Julie, asking if we could start this blog back up again.

She was enthusiastic and gave the green light. Huzzah!

Without further ado, I would like to introduce the rebooted Sinister Wisdom Blog. For all you Substackers, prolific journalers, or anyone who wants to share their stories: we are open to pitches!

What are we looking for: Any personal writing with a casual tone. Some examples: a day or week in the life, a behind-the-scenes look on a project you are working on, or a stream of consciousness piece. Anything outside the box is highly encouraged. Remember, the personal tone is what differentiates this from other Sinister Wisdom publications.

What we are not looking for: Works of fiction; hyperbole is more than welcome, but must be rooted in fact. Traditional reviews; you can go visit our friends at Wild Shrew Literary Review for that. Academic works; while posts can relate to academia, they should not be academic in nature.

How to pitch: Email blog@sinisterwisdom.org with any pitches or inquiries. Feel free to send a paragraph describing what you would like to write about, or full pieces for consideration.

We here at the Sinister Wisdom Blog look forward to hearing from you!

With love,

Sydney

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